Tyler J. Altemose
Okay, I'll admit that this is unfamiliar territory for me. Usually you'll find me hangin' around in the "Cap Crunch" and "News" sections. Occasionally I'll voice my opinion, too, but it's a known fact that this is DeNicola's territory.
But Adam Burish's cop out is too good to pass up here.
For those of you who have been living under a rock and don't know the back story here, let me explain.
After the Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup last June, Burish was interviewed. During said interview, Burish--who has a whopping 221 NHL games under his belt--called Flyers defenseman Chris Pronger the "biggest idiot in the league."
"I hope I never have to see him [Pronger] again. And if I see him out there I might punch him."
Oh really, Mr. Burish? Funny, those were tough words coming from a guy who knew that the chances of him ever meeting Chris Pronger again were slim to none.
But then the hockey gods smiled upon Flyerland. Less than one month after his comments--on 1 July, 2010--Adam Burish was signed by the Dallas Stars as an unrestricted free agent.
The Flyers and Stars, as you may know, are set to meet tomorrow.
Of course, you aren't the only one who knows about that. I'm sure Burish knew all too well that he'd be taking the ice with the 6'6", 220-pound Black and Orange beast with the iron elbows this weekend.
So what did he decide to do? Well, he did what any cowardly player who shoots his mouth off to a future Hall of Famer would do.
He went out and had his face broken in by someone else.
Yup, last night Adam Burish decided to tangle with Boston Bruins defensemen Andrew Ference. The result? A "facial injury" which conveniently put him on injured reserve.
Now we all know that New York Islanders net minder Rick DiPietro met a similar fate at the hands of Pittsburgh Penguins goaltender Brent Johnson, but it's been confirmed that DiPietro actually has facial fractures.
But for Burish, the team's statement is limited to calling the injury a "facial injury".
Is anything broken? Well, we know that Burish's pride is obviously shattered, but I'm pretty sure the CBA doesn't have any clauses which allow teams to put a player on IR because of a bruised ego.
The only conclusion I could come to is that Burish needed a cop out. He's not in the minors (like he should be) and he had no other excuse to get out of facing Pronger man-to-man.
Look, Adam. Can I call you Adam? I'm going to call you Adam. Hey, man, I know you were totally stoked when you won that Stanley Cup. It must have been great to stick it to the Flyers and win it in their building, eh? And all of those contributions to the Blackhawks organization to help them get to that point? You were absolutely robbed of the Conn Smythe.
But did you have to go and say something so stupid? I mean, you just won the Stanley Cup! You couldn't have dodged the issue?
Whatever, man. It's your funeral, not mine.
But wait--you're not going to have to worry about it because you're on IR and won't be playing the Flyers tomorrow.
That's right. How could I forget?
With that said, Adam, let me give you a few words of wisdom.
When you have the option to say something stupid about someone who is six inches taller and 30 pounds heavier than you or not to say something stupid about someone who is six inches taller and 30 pounds heavier than you--choose the latter option.
Flyers fans, grab your popcorn! It's the Burish Beatdown!