"He dekes left, he dekes right, he.....WHAT THE?????
Who says you can't have your cake and eat it too?
Ahhh, the splendors of being a Flyers fan and watching a hated rival sink like a row boat in a hurricane.
The New Jersey Failu...ah, Devils went up against the Buffalo Sabres last night and the tilt turned into Overtime which went into a Shoot Out.
Let's just skip ahead to that 100-Million Dollar Man, Ilya Kovalchuk, who had the game in his hands. He faced Sabres back-up net tender, Jhonas Enroth, who only has a few NHL games under his belt....so it pretty much went without saying that Kovalchuk (being one of the better puck handlers in the league) wouldn't have a problem putting the rubber past the inexperienced goalie.
If Kovi didn't bucket this shot, the Devils would lose. But seeing as how Ilya is making more money than a Colombian Drug Lord, clutchness is an attribute he must possess....right?
This despicable, greedy excuse of a "leader" manages to not even get a shot off. Instead, he loses the puck 10-feet from Enroth's crease and whiffs his stick on a phantom disc, thus digging New Jersey in an even deeper hole in the standings.
Sure, they gotta point out of it if you wish to acknowledge the silver lining, but let's get real.
The Devils were the dramatic talk of the off season. For one straight month that seemed like an eternity, New Jersey's GM Lou Lamoriello and Ilya Kovalchuk took hold of the NHL spotlight with talks of signing the Russian forward for more money than a person like you or I could comprehend. The largest contract in NHL history.
But I'm sure I don't have to revisit the semantics seeing as how they raped our eyeballs with every word in every article or news update we all read.
I have actually heard from some Flyers fans that they are "actually beginning to feel BAD" for the inner divisional rivals!
PFFFFFTTT!!! I on the other hand do not feel an ounce of pity for this franchise.
Not only has their fanbase sucked since the team took to the ice in 1982 (unless you count where they began as the Kansas City Scouts), but...but....I wasn't going anywhere with that. They just suck.
But back to the matter at hand.
Kovalchuk's deal disgusted fans NHL nationwide, and I must say that witnessing them struggle like a college freshman with his blow-up doll is without question one of the best things of this season -- aside from seeing my Orange Soldiers in the high rises of the Conference standings.
So enjoy the karma, Kovalchuk. It doesn't taste like vodka.